September Quips

September is a good month to think about education. Which reminds me, my teachers always told me I was a little slow. I was determined to go far in life, so I realized I better pick up the pace. Now you know.

What is holding you back and how will you overcome it? Where do you belong and when will you get there? Pretty heady stuff from a hard shelled reptile, don’t you think?

Winners expect to win in advance. Life is self-fulfilling that way. I remember reminding Shaq of that when he was having trouble with his free throw. On second thought, sometimes nothing helps!

Face it, we’re never going to escape criticism from overly critical bosses and spouses. I guess it helps when you can crawl up inside a shell. Ha ha, it sucks to be human.

August Quips

Success is a journey, not a destination. So get started on your journey. Enroll in a training course. It’s one small step that will make a giant leap in your career. Yeah, it was my line first. Neil Armstrong stole it.

Learning something new in a training course is as easy as learning how to whistle… just put your lips together and blow, like this. Of course it helps if you have lips.

Crossing the finish line is easier than getting past the start line. It’s the start that stops most people. Here’s what I do: pretend that the start line is the finish line. From then on it feels like you’re doing a victory lap.

Just back from my vacation up north. Spent two weeks on a lake enjoying lots of rest and relaxation. I slept on a log.

July Quips

Some people think there is more to life than increasing speed. Not me. I say get going! Learn something new! Hey, who are you going to believe, me or some guy named Gandhi?

Winning is all about attitude. For example, the lazy rabbit (bad attitude) came within a hare of winning the race. Think about it.

It's what you learn after you know it all that counts. I learned all about that the hard way — on a hunting trip with Dick Cheney.

Determination is what gets things done. When you want something done, call in a plugger – someone who will stick with it until it’s done. When you want something unplugged, call a plumber.